The Trail to Oregon! (2015) 94% 5★

Mom: You hear that, Lord? I did it! Now I can finally lay down and die.

Grandpa: He was more of a man than I'll ever be. And he was a lobster.

Dad: When God burns down a farm, he opens up a window, I always say.

Craphole: There's a hole in the wagon, dad.
Jack Bauer: It's not a hole, Craphole, it's called a floor-window.

Cletus Jones: My name is Cletus Jones. I've killed three people.

Mouthface: This isn't lobster, grandpa, it's baby buffalo. Remember? Craphole murdered it.
Jack Bauer: That's my son! Craphole, the baby killer.