Schizopolis (1996) 80% 2★

Do you love humanity but hate people?

[Pap a temetésen] Lester Richards is dead… and aren't you glad it wasn't you? Don't you wish you felt something? How many men here are attracted to Shelly, his--his lovely wife? She's a babe. And how many women here wish that their husbands would drop dead… and leave them a big, fat insurance policy? Yes, I thought so. Hell, it'll be years before you figure out what Lester's death really means. So let's forget the blah-blah-blah and go have a drink. Amen.

Fletcher Munson: Generic greeting!
Mrs. Munson: Generic greeting returned!
Fletcher Munson: Imminent sustenance.
Mrs. Munson: Overly dramatic statement regarding upcoming meal.
Fletcher Munson: Oooh! False reaction indicating hunger and excitement!

I believe so strongly in mayonnaise.